I get lots of mail regarding the wife's/girlfriend's thoughts. Why are they mad? What did I do? Here's a few thoughts on staying out of trouble. Next time she asks you tricky questions; answer her this way.

Listen to what she's asking you -- not what she says, but what she means. A woman wants the man in her life to see things from her point of view, She wants to feel like you're on the same page. Here's Butter’s quick guide to dodging any conversational bear trap.

She asks: "Can you believe Dan cheated on Sarah?"
You answer: "What could he have been thinking?"
Doesn't matter if shes talking about friends or TV characters -- this is her thinly veiled way of checking your moral compass. In her perfect world, you'd tell her you don't condone cheating under any circumstances, and punctuate your statement with "Hope his pecker turns black and falls off." She wants to know you empathize with the woman.

She asks: "Is she pretty?"
You answer: "Are you fishing for compliments?"
She could be talking about your ex, your coworker, or that hot waitress. Whoever the woman, your girlfriend doesn't want to feel threatened. Confront this one head-on, but do so with a bit of humor. Then offer her a reassuring ego boost by telling her she's beautiful.

She asks: "Why is my best friend being such a bitch?"
You answer: "I don't blame you for being ticked off."
This one's a catch-22. No woman wants to hear that someone she cares about is a bitch. But she also wants you to be on her side. You have to validate her feelings, but not necessarily agree with her. Whatever you do, don't insult the friend (or family member) in the process.

She asks: "Would you go out with Angelina Jolie?"
You answer: "Angelina has fat lips. I prefer yours."
Of course you'd go out with Angelina Jolie. You'd be on her like hot butter on sweet corn. You know it, and your girlfriend knows it. (Just as she'd be nannying the hell out of Jude Law if she had the chance.) "She's trying to pick a fight. Instead of answering either way, find a flaw in the hottie. You didn't lie, and you made the woman in your life feel attractive.